Picture this: on a night colder than your ex’s heart, Cornelius and I found ourselves in our favorite drinking spot, nursing the last sips of our German beer, the kind that’s darker than my dating history. But there was nothing amusing about Cornelius – the guy who usually radiates happiness looked like he just binge-watched a season of sad movies.
So, being the good friend and amateur therapist I am, I asked Cornelius what in the world had him looking like the star of a tragic romance novel. Turns out, his four-year love story with Shiko had hit a plot twist that even Shakespeare would find a bit much. Love had done a 180 on him – from a rom-com to a horror show. Happiness was on vacation, and acceptance had filed for divorce. Love had turned into its evil twin: hate.
Let me paint the backdrop here: Cornelius, our man, had just landed a cushy accounting job after what felt like a never-ending era of being broke. Naturally, he thought, “Time to bring Shiko into the picture!” Enter the ‘come we stay’ relationship – the budget-friendly edition of marriage. No dowry, no wedding, just two people, a house, and hopefully, some shared Netflix passwords.
Now, here’s the kicker – Cornelius, a proud Luo from the village, was dancing the tango of love with Shiko, a Kikuyu. In Kenya, that’s like mixing oil and water or trying to unite cats and dogs. But hey, love knows no tribe, right? Their parents, surprisingly progressive, gave the thumbs up, breaking stereotypes faster than a speeding bullet.
Fast forward to the sitcom part of the story: Shiko started acting like she was auditioning for a role in a soap opera. Moody, rude – basically the opposite of the woman Cornelius fell for. She even had a mysterious “uncle” on speed dial, disappearing every weekend like she was part of a witness protection program.
Despite the red flags waving like crazy, Cornelius, in true African man fashion, endured silently. Days turned into weeks, and he went from ‘Loving Husband’ to ‘Detective Cornelius.’ Long story short, he discovered Shiko’s secret messages and realized he was starring in a drama he never auditioned for.
So there we were, Cornelius and I, drowning his heartbreak in beer darker than the turn of events in his love life. As he poured out his woes, I couldn’t help but think, “Man, Shakespeare would’ve loved this tragic comedy.”
I reassured him that this messy chapter in his life was just a plot twist, not the whole damn story. We’d flip the script, turn the page, and one day, we’d reminisce about this bizarre rom-com that had more twists than a rollercoaster.
As we clinked our beer mugs in a toast to new beginnings, I told Cornelius, “Life just handed you a lemon-flavored plot twist, my friend. Let’s make some damn good lemonade – the kind that’s so good, it overshadows the bitter taste of heartbreak.”
And so, with laughter as our soundtrack, we embraced the uncertainty of tomorrow, because, after all, nothing dulls life’s drama like a good dose of humor and the promise that the best stories are yet to be written. Cheers to the next chapter, my friend – may it be filled with more love, laughter, and a plot that even Hollywood would envy.
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